Seeking Connection and Guidance: Navigating Family Contact in New Zealand

I want to spend time with my children in New Zealand but I dont know where they are. How can I find them and what can I do to spend time with them, what if there is a family violence order between the mother of the children where i am the respondent?

Step 1: Finding Your Children in New Zealand

If you genuinely do not know your children's location, the New Zealand Family Court has mechanisms to assist, particularly if you are applying for a Parenting Order.

• File an Application for a Parenting Order: This is the formal legal step to ask the court to set arrangements for the care of your children, including who they live with (day-to-day care) and who they spend time with (contact).
• Request for Address Disclosure: As part of your application, you can ask the Family Court to direct the Registrar to request the disclosure of the children's address from the other parent or relevant government agencies, like the Ministry of Social Development (MSD). The court will only disclose the address if it is safe to do so.
• Legal Assistance is Crucial: Given the complexity, particularly with a Protection Order in place, engaging a lawyer is essential. They can file the correct documents and navigate the disclosure process for you. You may be eligible for Legal Aid or the Family Legal Advice Service (FLAS) if you cannot afford a lawyer.

Step 2: Addressing the Family Violence Protection Order

The existence of a Protection Order where you are the respondent is a serious legal matter that directly impacts how you can seek contact. It is critical to follow the conditions of the Protection Order at all times. Breaching it is a criminal offence.

• The Protection Order’s Conditions: A standard Protection Order usually includes conditions that prohibit you from using violence and from contacting the protected people (the children and their mother), including going to their home, school, or workplace.
• Parenting and Protection Orders: A Protection Order takes precedence. This means any contact with the children must be either:
  1. Specifically stated in the Protection Order as a special condition.
  2. Agreed to in writing by the protected person (the children's mother) unless the court has ordered supervised contact or other specific conditions that overrule her ability to consent to contact with the child.
  3. Part of a separate court order (like a Parenting Order).

Step 3: Pathway to Spending Time with Your Children (Contact)

The court's decision will always be based on the welfare and best interests of the child, and with a history of family violence, safety is the paramount concern.

A. Out-of-Court Resolution (If Appropriate)

The usual first step for parenting disputes is Family Dispute Resolution (FDR), which is a mediation service.

• Violence Exception: You are usually excused from having to attend FDR if there are issues of family violence, and your application for a Parenting Order can go directly to court. However, in some cases, a mediated process, like shuttle mediation (where you and the mother are kept separate) or online mediation, may be possible if both parties agree and the FDR provider assesses it as safe.
• Parenting Through Separation (PTS) Course: You will likely need to attend the free "Parenting Through Separation" course before applying for a Parenting Order, unless you are excused by the court (e.g., due to urgency or being overseas).

B. Applying for a Parenting Order in the Family Court

If you are excused from FDR or mediation is deemed unsafe, you apply directly to the Family Court for a Parenting Order.

• Child's Safety First: The court will prioritise the children's safety. Given the Protection Order, the Judge may initially be inclined to order Supervised Contact.
  • Supervised Contact: This means contact with your children takes place in a safe, controlled environment (often a supervised contact centre) with an approved person present. This is designed to rebuild a relationship while ensuring the children's physical and emotional safety.
  • Safety Risk Assessment: The court will assess the risks to the children before making any order about contact. They may appoint a Lawyer for the Child to represent your children's views and a social worker to provide a professional report.
• Proving Safety and Change: To move toward unsupervised or increased contact, you will need to demonstrate to the court that you have taken steps to address the issues that led to the Protection Order. The court may order you to attend a non-violence program or counselling as a condition for contact.

Key Resources and Connections

Crucial Note: This blog provides general information about the legal framework in New Zealand. Given the Protection Order, you must seek immediate and specific legal advice from a New Zealand family lawyer. Do not attempt to contact the children or their mother against the terms of the Protection Order. Your priority should be to engage with the legal system safely and professionally.